Monday, November 17, 2014

on returning

of course, i'm writing the typical entry on this blog that has the familiar "it's been so long since i've been on here" post. i'll spare the predictable promise to post every day. yes, instead, i'm just here when time allows to share (mainly for myself) the musings in my head about the little adventures that my life has been fortunate to be apart of.

recently, i've discovered something quite sad about myself. in recent conversations with my husband about our dreams and goals for year two of marriage, it became so tragically clear that i may have lost my sense of self somewhere within the last 11 months. in the midst of a wonderful & challenging first year of marriage, in the excitement of bringing our baby girl into this world and in the chaos of moving shortly after her birth, i realized that i have been watching other people live their lives instead of actively and intentionally living my own.

paralyzed is what i've allowed myself to become. instead of being inspired by pinterest to create, i pin and "save for later". instead of taking pictures to upload to instagram, i waste time browsing pictures of others living their lives. instead of blogging, i read blogs. instead of creating conversations with people, i sit by and wait for someone else to initiate them. instead of going outside and enjoying the beauty of God's creation, i sit inside and "wander the great indoors". a voice in my head is continuously telling me that "i can't" or "i will never" so instead i just sit.

my hope is to return. to return to this beautiful life that God has so graciously given me. he has given me some of the best gifts in life. i don't want to sit here and let life pass me by while i sit on the sidelines. he has called me to chase dreams. he calls me to create and be inspired.

so, yes, i'm back. but i'm back with a more intentional and deeper purpose than perhaps a ton of my old posts. i hope to find inspiration again; that i find my drive to create; that i stop hiding behind fear that keeps me from living.

so, hello again.


Sunday, December 8, 2013

winter bucket list

The last time we left off, I was just about to move into my new place... which brings me to realize that it's been about a year since I last posted anything. To update you, I've since moved in, got engaged (July), and then married (Nov.-wow!). It's so sweet to sit here and type about such changes in my life.

Currently, I'm snuggled up on the couch next to my new hubby & our cuddly puppy is napping on the other side of me. Life is pretty excellent at the moment seeing as how we are currently on our 3rd day of being iced in. While I might potentially be catching that cabin fever, I've also enjoyed the magic that is being stuck in the house with an endless amount of Christmas movies to watch & freshly popped popcorn at our fingertips.

During our honeymoon, Michael and I talked about how much we both love the idea of creating our own traditions in hopes of sharing them with our children one day. We are really great at coming up with ideas, but sometimes the busyness of life gets in the way of us getting around to actually doing what we have dreamed up.

Originally, I considered an Advent Calendar, but quickly realized that planning a daily activity for us to accomplish was a little bit unrealistic with our busy schedules. I didn’t want to go into this setting ourselves up for failure. I decided on creating a bucket list to keep us on track not only for the days leading up to Christmas, but also for the rest of the winter season.

If you’re like me, I’m pretty much over with winter time as soon as January 1st arrives so I’m hoping that this list will help us look forward to the days ahead instead of wishing the winter days away. Since I’m a very visual person, I decided that I wanted to make something for us to be able to see every day. I had leftover note cards from our wedding & decided to use each card for an item on the list.

Lately I've been obsessed with creating banners (don’t ask!), so I decided to run with his obsession and created a “Winter Bucket List” banner. To do this I simply created a Word document & enlarged the font to 350 or so. Once I printed it out, I cut the letters out and then traced them on to scrapbook paper. Once I had all of my letters cut out, I taped them to some pretty baker’s twine that I found at Target.

I originally planned on using some more baker’s twine & clothespins to hang up my cards, but completely forgot to purchase said clothespins prior to the snowpacolypse. Instead, I used double sided tape to hang up each of my cards. Since Christmas is the time of year to get overly festive, I decided to hang up my cards in the shape of a Christmas tree…awww!

Not only does this list help to add to Christmas decorations we have around our home, but I can’t help but get excited over the memories we will be creating this winter each time I look at our list. Of course, the plan is to properly document each item on our list via pictures. As Instagram does a really great job at making my picture taking skills look like I’m a professional, I’ll definitely be documenting here so feel free to follow along!

I’ve also promised myself that once our list is complete, I’ll be making a photo album with all of our pictures & bucket list cards. I can’t wait to see what memories we make and what traditions we create from this fun list!


Thursday, January 17, 2013

sway me now...

i have been meaning to post, but have yet to muster up the energy to type out all of the ideas in my head or to give an adequate update of what has been going on since this post. i promise, it's coming soon! BUT, i just stumbled upon the most beautiful & romantic pictures of cooking & food (yes, i said ROMANTIC) ... and thought i would share them with you. i thought i would share them because they inspire me. they inspire me to fall in love with cooking; to spend quality time in the kitchen; a sudden realization of the song and dance that is cooking....a swaying of sorts. over time i have developed an itch for becoming a food photographer and am convinced that this has pushed me over the edge...seriously guys, i'm pretty sure that  i need to go ahead and invest in some photography classes because as much as i love my instagram pictures (also as seen above), nothing can compare to what you are about to witness... nothing. at. all. *sigh*... and even if you don't enjoy these like i do, take the time to read her posts. she is a wonderful writer of stories. 

and of course, i have included a song for you to listen to as you scroll up and down the pages of this blog. and if rosemary clooney isn't your thing, try out some pavarotti. besides, you should ONLY listen to this music while cooking anyway.... if not, you are completely missing out. 

Friday, November 30, 2012


i'm pretty sure i just squealed like a little girl who found out she was going to get Justin Bieber to perform at her sweet sixteen. never in my life have i been so excited about floors; EVER. somehow there is so much adrenaline and excitement flowing through these little veins of mine. (and thus, i'm reminded how much older i may be getting with excitement over things like this.) i knew that once these floors were installed it would change the entire feel of my new home, but gosh, i never realized how dramatic & beautiful that change would be. 
(see old flooring here)

new floors means no more ugly exposed staple holes from past carpet. 
new floors mean that i can walk around without fear of my shoes being completely covered in sawdust. 
new floors mean that i can start moving my things in. 
new floors mean that this is actually happening. 

 i'm in love, i'm in love, i'm in love! 
so excited to step on these laminate floors. 


Tuesday, November 27, 2012


Very soon, these empty spaces will be a new place to call home. a  new season. a place to grow. the quiet & the stillness that will push me to get to a place to discover myself; to step in to more of my own skin than ever before. my own space to entertain, clean, cook, read, sleep, be lazy, drink wine. i am excited, anxiously awaiting the official move in date. a date when it all becomes real; when boxes upon boxes will be shuffled to their new location. a date when i can point to empty spaces and fill them with those things that somehow materialistically define who i am. completely guilty of daydreaming about the least important items in which i will fill my new home with. trying to focus on the most essential of things. 

as i remind myself to hold off on the daydreaming i challenge myself to be intentional about these next few weeks: to enjoy the company of my family and the accessibility of their presence; to cherish moments & opportunities; to reflect on memories and hold them dear. to be reminded of seasons and the time for changing. 

so thankful for this time & for those who have invested to make this possible. i can't even begin to thank each and every one of you. 


a smile.

“It was only a sunny smile, and little it cost in the giving, but like morning light it scattered the night and made the day worth living.”  - F. Scott Fitzgerald

somehow, some time recently  i've fallen in love with the  romancing of sentences.. 

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

happy birthday, brother!

i've been searching for quite some time trying to find this picture of my brother and i circa 1990 (?) which puts us around age 4 and 2. clearly, we were HUGE rangers fans back in the day. glad to see that our family is still pretty loyal. needless to say, it's one of my favorite pictures of us to this day. it reminds me of simpler times, when we had no cares in the world other than looking cute; which i think we were pretty good at pulling off. :)  it also has me thinking of how important it is to cherish special moments with the ones you love; making memories, laughing, enjoying each other's personalities and just loving each other in a way that no one else can, because you are family. 

the last 5 years my brother has spent serving his country in the Army. i am so completely proud of his selflessness in fighting for our country; having to be separated from the comforts of home and familiarity. in my selfishness, however, i wish he were in the same zip code as me; always.  thankfully skype has been there to sort of bridge that gap, but there's nothing like quality time just hanging out as if we have no cares in the world all over again. 

so glad that this year he was able to come home just in time to for his 24th birthday. each year we aren't sure if we will get to spend holidays or birthdays with him, so any chance that he gets to come home is a need for celebration anyway. i'm really excited about tonight where we will get together with friends &  family and celebrate my brother's life over some delicious pizza and wine! 

to my brother, eli: i'm so proud of the man that you are becoming. to be one who has always been an advocate for helping others. to sacrifice the comforts of home living and familiarity and trading it in for foreign places, and different worlds. for the love you have for those you hold most dearest. those things i will always admire about you. for the laughter and movie talks, and arnold impersonations; i will always look forward to. hoping this year of 24 brings times of growth and everlasting joys; deeper relationships, conversations and memories, all moments to bring you  closer to becoming more of you: who you are & who you want to be. i love you. 

happy birthday, Eli!